The Magazine

Bail Me Out, Mr. Paulson

Print journalists aren't feeling the love, these days.

Dec 1, 2008, Vol. 14, No. 11 • By P.J. O'ROURKE
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Remember, America, you can't wrap a fish in satellite radio or line the bottom of your birdcage with MSNBC (however appropriate that would be). It's expensive to swat flies with a pod-casting iPod. Newsboys tossing flat screen monitors onto your porch will damage the wicker furniture. And a dog that's trained to piddle on your high-speed Internet connection can cause a dangerous electrical short-circuit and burn down your house.

P.J. O'Rourke is a contributing editor to THE WEEKLY STANDARD.

*For house-breaking puppies

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