Seinfeld fans surely remember the episode in which Kramer has an idea for a cologne that smells like you just came from the beach. On page D3 of this weekend's Off Duty section of the Wall Street Journal, Aleksandra Crapanzano writes,

IMAGINE, FOR A MOMENT, walking through a garden of honeysuckle and wild roses, down a sandy path of beach plums and tall wavy grasses. Then, at the exact moment you come upon a wide stretch of beach, a soft, salty, generous breeze comes up from the ocean to welcome you home for the summer. This is the scent of lazy days, hot sun and the shiver of stepping into the cold water. It's impossible to bottle, but these five fragrances do come awfully close. Of course, all beaches are different, so why not have a fragrance for each of your favorites? There's something deeply satisfying about sinking into the sand, tuning out to the sound of waves and finding that elusive peace. Here's a selection from near and far to get you there with just a whiff—or, better yet, to inspire an actual excursion.

She isn't joking, although it certainly sounds like Crapanzano was channeling J. Peterman in describing these perfumes, whose names include Ecume de Rose, Sel Marin, and Fleurs de Sel. Surprisingly, Crapanzano makes no mention of the Kramer precedent, although one Journal reader does ask, "Is Kosmo Kramer receiving royalties?"

Up next, a pizza parlor where the customers make their own pizzas.

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