October 13, 2008 • Vol. 14, No. 5
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Study Aliens After School

From alien killer to alien worshiper, Will Smith is starting a new school to bring the teachings of L. Ron Hubbard to impressionistic young people. I'm sure parents will be eager to send their kids, because Smith is such a great judge of character and has said yes to aliens. As long as children are studying Battlefield Earth and not the Bible, no one in Hollywood should get too upset.

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